Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary


Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71.

Known to friends as Brown-n-Serve, Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player. Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Aunt Jemima, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Skippy. The graveside was piled high with flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man who "never knew how much he was kneaded."

Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes -- conned by those who buttered him up.

Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions. Fresh is survived by his second wife. They have two children and another bun in the oven. The funeral was held at 350 for about 20 minutes.
(Courtesy of Carl)

8 comments:

  1. Pop N. Fresh is back from the grave to haunt you because you didn't comment on his obituary. Ooohh Booohh Hoooo. I'm a Ghost!

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  2. why would any person, among the millions who he was the role model for, want to be baked?

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  3. once again...and again....
    NO COMMENT.

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  4. That is 4 times you have posted a comment that said "no comment". Will the madness ever end?

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  5. ...no comment...
    MWHAHAHAHAHHA you shall NEVER stop me! :)

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  6. but you see, that was a comment, thus making it a fallacy, and making all of your opinions invalid. As of now, you are now irrelevant.

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  7. ...no comment...
    ...no comment...
    ...no comment...
    ...no comment...
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    ...no comment...

    Now Gopal, you must understand, though I say what I say, it doesn't mean I mean it. If I told you 'I'm sorry', that doesn't mean I mean it. Humans are strange. We come up with these strange ways of talking, and we never really mean anything. 'Tis a certain lesson we have yet to learn. Our ability to create new things and shape them also adds the ability for us to say anything we'd like. No one's stopping us. Thus my point being "MWHAHAHAHAHHA you shall NEVER stop me!" in my mind of being a human...

    That didn't make any sense. :)

    -Denise

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